Coaching or Counseling - How to Decide?
A client sits across from you sharing their concern for the future. As you listen compassionately, it’s clear that they’re feeling rather “stuck”. They’re frustrated and distraught about what to do. You notice a lack of excitement expressed about what’s next for them.
You know through your years of supporting families with their Financial and Life Planning that this person would greatly benefit from some outside help.
Do they need a Counselor? Do they need a Coach?
Let’s distinguish the 3 key differences of Coaching and Counseling so you’re able to make an informed suggestion that benefits their wellness.
Some background…
The Coaching profession took off in the 90’s. A group of folks found that while there were great resources for specific life areas (like physical or financial) there was a growing movement of people wanting to improve across many areas of their lives - and not just because there was a crisis.
The ICF , the largest global governing body for Coaches, reports 33,287* coaches in 136 countries and territories who hold one of three ICF Credentials for 2021 (*this number is subject to frequent change). There are (currently) just 1,300 Master Certified Coaches worldwide!
Compare this to over 198,800 therapists and over 81,000 psychologists practicing in the United States alone.
That number likely shocks you because the title, “Coach” is rampant. It’s important to look for credentials and be sure your Coach completed an accredited training program.
Counseling is traced back to the late 1800’s with roots in talk therapy (psychotherapy); discussing with a trained professional feelings, thoughts, and behaviors and determining how to progress in a healthy way. Sigmund Freud, Franz Mesmer, B.F. Skinner, Albert Ellis, and Aaron Beck are known names that have influenced the practice in big ways.
Let’s get into the differences to consider with these two helping professions.
3 Key Distinctions
Is the challenge impairing daily living?
Coaching is the recommendation when someone expresses feeling “stuck”, though they’re often still fully operating across life dimensions. The nagging issue perhaps isn’t making any external (observable) impact. On the outside things may seem okay, great even! Yet, on the inside, it can be a very different story. They’re craving clarity on how to handle something deeply important to them. They’re craving clarity on what to do next. The unbiased Coach is a fantastic sounding board to clarify thinking patterns. When we think more clearly, we’re able to act more intentionally.
Counseling is the recommendation when someone is experiencing something pervasive or traumatic that’s impacting their daily experience with the world. Some examples include diagnosed or undiagnosed ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, or OCD. Perhaps their was a trauma experience or abusive relationship in their history that is negatively impacting their ability to cope with daily life.
2. Past or Future Focus?
Coaching is the recommendation when someone has a sense of future urgency. Perhaps there’s an opportunity they never saw coming (a promotion? a move? a new child?) and they want to be at their best for the situation. There’s often a deep desire to be a good steward of their time, talents, and treasure, but they’re running into roadblocks on how to do that. During Coaching sessions the vast majority of attention is spent on determining What are you currently experiencing? coupled with How do you want to experience this?. We honor the context and history of each client yet ask very little “why” questions about past decisions. Coaching allows ample space for their resourcefulness in determining an improved life.
Counseling is the recommendation if the challenge is more entangled with the past. Perhaps there is a key person, situation, or experience that they’re ready to explore the difficult factors? Bringing up difficult memories needs to be done in a safe, trusted, therapeutic relationship. It is often not a linear path to healing. The client may not be ready to look forward to new goals until there’s been healing and exploration with something in the past.
3. Authority or Peer Approach?
Coaching is the recommendation if someone is open to exploration and wants to be a key driver of insight. Coaches believe that we are not the experts on a client’s life. It is not our role to rate someone’s goals, or tell them the best way (we think) to get there. It’s our role to empower the client’s decision making so they’re clear on what’s ahead and know that their strengths and values are pedaling them forward. Of course, we point out possible blind spots and help wrestle with challenges. The difference is that it’s presented in a non-attached way to the outcome. Coaching is a more peer-to-peer approach; respecting the resourcefulness of each person. Many people who experience Coaching find that they learn and progress faster due to the uniquely personal process.
Counseling is the recommendation if you’re seeking an expert of a certain modality to speak into your life. Counselors can offer guidance, education, and implementation of a variety of treatment approaches. Some include, Family Systems Therapy, EMDR, Play Therapy, or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. In these partnerships, there’s an expectation that the client is asking for help because they’re struggling in an area and the counselor can teach and help provide a way out.
In closing…
Remember, counselors need to be licensed. This means a master’s degree, clinical supervision, background check, and exam. Licenses are monitored by state and must be renewed every two years with continuing education courses.
Coaching is monitored by certifications. Be sure to check! The ICF is the gold-standard.
I applaud you for your compassionate approach to your clients’ health - beyond their financial health. They trust you with one of their most prized possessions - their hard-earned money - it’s likely they approach you for other areas of advice as well.
At the end of the day, if you’re unsure about which one is right for your client, offer both!
There are many coaching and counseling search engines where you can pair up with a professional who fits your needs. The International Coaching Federation has a “Find A Coach” directory.
If you are in need of a licensed counselor as a resource, please let me know and I’d love to connect you with quality KC professionals.
